Ebay: Questions For Seller
A: This item is amazing! Happy Ebaying!
Q: My question was more about what physical form this item takes. Thanks.
A: This is a physical item and it is amazing! You won’t be disappointed. Happy bidding!
Q: Hi I just saw this and I’m also confused about what you’re selling here. Could you please provide more details?
A: Sure! This amazing item is unique in the world. I’ve owned it for almost ten years! Wow, when I say that, it seems hard to believe that time has already gone by. I will say though, things were pretty great before my accident. Well, good luck and thanks for looking!
Q: Hello, is this item a female robot?
A: No, I’m not currently selling any robots.
Q: Hi, I emailed a couple times earlier. I just noticed that all of the bidders for your item have user names that are very similar to yours. In fact, all of them are “steve##” with different numbers at the end. Are you bidding on your own item?
A: Wow, I’m glad someone else noticed that – I thought I was going crazy! Seriously though, there are a lot of Steves in the world. Thanks for your question!
Q: This item is amazing! Is there any chance that I could pay you DOUBLE the amount of the highest bid when the auction closes?
A: I agree that this item is amazing and worth at least what you’re offering, but that’s against Ebay rules and unfair to all of the bidders, sorry. Good luck!
Q: I think you emailed that last question to yourself. I’m seriously considering reporting you to Ebay staff.
A: What was your question?
Q: Do you have any pictures of the item to prove that it exists?
A: Yes! I have hundreds of pictures but unfortunately, I don’t currently own a computer so I can’t email them or add them to the listing. Thanks for looking!
Q: That doesn’t make any sense. You’re using a computer to answer these questions.
A: No, you’re the asshole, buddy!
Q: You don’t actually have an item to sell, do you?
A: Yes I do. It’s a female robot.
Q: No it isn’t. You answered an earlier question by saying that you weren’t selling any robots.
A: No it isn’t. You answered an earlier question by saying meh meh meh blah blah bleh hey look at me, I’m an asshole with a computer.
Q: I’ve just notified Ebay staff of your fraudulent listing. Happy Ebaying.
A: Ok, fine, you want the truth? The truth is that I don’t actually have an item to sell. I’m destitute, lonely and I require expensive medication to keep me from doing unpredictable, dangerous things. Things that can cause harm to others. Sometimes to people I’ve never met. Do you understand what I’m saying?
Q: Are you threatening me?
A: Yes. And your family.
Bidding for item #413210780 has ended. Steve65 is the winning bidder.
Leave a Reply
You must be logged in to post a comment.