You So Crazy
Someone catches their reflection in the mirror, frozen with the new knowledge of unkempt hair or makeup, then spins towards you and shouts "Jesus! You didn't tell me I looked crazy." You hadn't noticed. But that's not really the issue - what's more important is how you'd tell someone they look crazy, if you had noticed. Is it best to be direct about it?
Bob: Morning!
You: Whoa! Bob, you look a little crazy this morning.
The addition of a question expressing concern can provide a helpful emotional buffer while effectively conveying your sincerity.
Bob: Morning!
You: Whoa! Bob, you look a little crazy this morning - IS EVERYTHING OK?
Depending on the nature of your relationship with Bob, add physical contact to further diffuse any hurt feelings he may have.
Bob: Morning!
You: Whoa! Bob, you look a little crazy this morning (TOUCH BOB'S SHOULDER) - is everything ok?
If you prefer a passive-aggressive-funny approach to your daily interactions, go with it.
Bob: Morning!
You: Whoa! Easy there CHIEF CRAZY HORSE!
Can't do humor? Maybe a handwritten note is in order.
Bob: Morning!
Bob: Morning!
You: Whoa! Bob, you look a little crazy this morning.
The addition of a question expressing concern can provide a helpful emotional buffer while effectively conveying your sincerity.
Bob: Morning!
You: Whoa! Bob, you look a little crazy this morning - IS EVERYTHING OK?
Depending on the nature of your relationship with Bob, add physical contact to further diffuse any hurt feelings he may have.
Bob: Morning!
You: Whoa! Bob, you look a little crazy this morning (TOUCH BOB'S SHOULDER) - is everything ok?
If you prefer a passive-aggressive-funny approach to your daily interactions, go with it.
Bob: Morning!
You: Whoa! Easy there CHIEF CRAZY HORSE!
Can't do humor? Maybe a handwritten note is in order.
Bob: Morning!
Naturally, you'll need to give some thought to how to respond when Bob asks what you mean. Again, tailor this action to suit your own communication style. The most effective responses will be those that avoid being too specific.
Bob: Morning!
You: Whoa! Bob, you look a little crazy this morning.
Bob: Wha, what do you mean?
You: It's just, wow. YOU know.
or
What do you mean, 'what do I mean?'
or
Pshooo! (mimic bomb whistle and explosion)
If he keeps asking questions, it means you're not walking away quickly enough. Wait to deliver your message until you've identified all your available escape routes. Remember, you're just trying to get Bob to a mirror so he can assess the situation on his own, so don't be a hero. If you can accomplish that, pat yourself on the back for a job well done.
Discussion:
Now, listen, people. Some amount of care should be taken when deciding whether or not to bring up the subject with Bob. For example, if you see Bob with a shredded tie, muddy pants and blood-soaked shirt, carrying a small axe in his right hand and a length of rope in his left, it's obviously OK to approach him, as most likely he's worked out all his dangerous craziness already. However, if Bob only has a "weird hair situation" and a bit of toothpaste at the corner of his mouth, just turn around a walk away. This particular bomb could go off at any moment.
Hey, um, Sloan, er...you might...uh, you know...I think there're mirrors in the men's room.
Why won't you people leave me alone?
I guess it goes without saying that you could never have these conversations with a girl. You should come up wih a new guide just for that, because some of the time we look nuts.
i'm the girl who said that. and at the moment, i did look REALLY crazy, man.
Yeah, good one. How would you approach a girl with crazy hair? I mean, who’s to say she isn’t doing it on purpose?
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